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One additional problem with this idea is that all currently buffable buildings are already highlighted. if we was to just highlight the buildings we want buffed then anyone else visiting to buff you for a daily or guild quest or plain old generosity would see no buildings to be buffed. If you want to indicate which buildings you want buffed then you need a different way which does not conflict with a existing mechanic.
Easy way of highlighting them, buff them yourself then they will glow nice and bright for the person coming over, lol.
What next, have BB play the game for you?
I have voted before for a simple message window for visiting friends. I think this would provide a lot of benefits. It would be wonderful to leave a generic "Hi Friend - if you want to buff something, any of my hardwood saw mills would be great!".
However, since that is not currently the case,I have asked friends to not buff me unless I ask them specifically, because I have schedules for certain buffs on certain buildings at certain times (matching my work/home schedule, and I'm sure I'm not alone in that) and that solves the problem. If I get an over-happy friend who likes to buff regardless of my requests then are simply not a friend anymore.